epiphany

I have yet to run my first miles of 2017.

After 5 months of repeatedly thinking that my foot was better enough to run again, and then painfully realizing that it wasn’t after days or weeks of slowly easing back into it, I decided as I rang in the New Year that the miles I run this year will be worth waiting for.

In August my foot began hurting. I rested for weeks and went to see two different chiropractors. It was getting a little better, but the pain was not going away. I wasn’t satisfied that I was on the right path.

In September I went to see a podiatrist and had an x-ray that came up clean. I was diagnosed with plantar fasciitis and prescribed rest, ice, heat and orthotics. I saw a physical therapist and began a routine of exercises given to me to help correct my imbalances. I joined a yoga studio and a gym and got myself in the pool. My coach gave me workouts to do while I rested my foot.

In October I tried running again, and started to think maybe I was on my way to getting better. But there was still a consistent pain all day, even if it were to a lesser degree. I went to see a new physical therapist and a sports orthopedist who is a Boston runner himself. I had an MRI which came back indicating plantar fasciitis, once again – no stress reactions, no fractures, no tears. After a few more weeks of rest, swimming and yoga, my foot was still hurting. On the last day of October I had a cortisone shot. This was a step I was totally fearful of, but my doctor felt that the condition warranted it. So I tried it. Continue reading

the sweet spot

The other day Maddie and I went for our first run together since crossing the finish line in Boston last week.  It was easy and light and neither one of us could have cared any less about how fast or how far we were going.  Really.  We talked about nothing and everything all at once … jibber-jabbering on and on … sharing our stories about Boston, catching up on all that is happening in our personal lives, and dreaming about the future — in running and in life.  I could have run with her all day.  Could have chatted with her for miles and miles and miles more.

And it makes me so happy because I know we will do that.  We have miles and miles ahead of us to share and reflect and dream.  To just run and do what we love.

Side-by-side, step-for-step, breath-for-breath.   We are in it together.

When we are in the midst of serious training, we are focused so much of the time.  This winter we were both as dedicated as we could possibly be – we trained indoors when it was too icy or freezing out.  We showed up for one another and pushed one another when I am certain we both could have been persuasive and given ourselves permission to turn hard runs into easy runs or run fewer miles than planned or just not run at all.  We dialed ourselves into some pretty intense and totally confidence-boosting workouts.

It was hard.  And it was awesome.

high five after completing our last long run for Boston!

After our run on Monday we talked about the plans for the rest of the week.  We were both all smiles, so happy, so chill.  We said this part of our running lives is like a “sweet spot”  – if we let it be.  It’s so necessary to have this time between training cycles – time to recover, recharge and reset.  We aren’t worried about the pace or the mileage, but we are still moving.  We feel so grateful for how far we’ve come and for the races we just ran and are excited about the dreams we have ahead of us, the mountains we want to climb.  Right now though, we get to enjoy this sweet spot, this time to reflect and dream and plan and run for the pure joy it brings us.

I was thinking about it after we finished our run, because I can sometimes get really grouchy when I’m in both the taper and recovery phases of my training.  I BELIEVE in them and I stick to them and I certainly honor them, but I don’t always EMBRACE them or savor them for how sweet I think they are truly meant to be.  My taper for Boston was peppered with a lot of moments of anxiety because I didn’t know what was going on with my knee bruise or how fast it would heal.  That uncertainly on top of the normal taper-crazies just made me feel all kinds of nutty.  I had to very consciously choose a positive attitude, over and over again on a daily basis, to trust it would all be okay — however it was meant to be.

And now that I’m on the other side of that (and by the way, miraculously my knee did not bug me ONCE during the race and has been pretty much as good as new ever since!), I am reminded of how the perspective I choose is – and really always has been – up to me.  It is my choice.

So today I am choosing to enjoy rather than to endure this time in my running.  The next month or so is a sweet spot to be in for sure.  Full of post-race bliss and ripe with possibility.