whatever it takes

Today baby Gus is 4 months old.  Wow how time flies when you’re having fun!  This little soul has increased the joy in my heart by leaps and bounds.  My, how I love him.

The past 4 months have been filled with so many smiles and tons of laughter over this sweet little baby boy.  I cannot believe how blessed I am to be his momma.

He is doing great.  Laughing, smiling, cooing and rolling over – almost.  He gets to his side and hangs out there for a bit before flopping back onto his back.  He thinks it’s great fun and I have to admit so do I.  I love watching him figure stuff out and connect with the world around him.  Realize what he can do.  It is totally awesome!!

In the last month though, something has been going on with my little man’s skin and his tummy.  I have seen it before, in his older brother Will when he was a baby.  Oozy red patches of skin that look uncomfortable and itchy.  A LOT of spit up, more than the average baby.  I tried everything I knew to help him (aquafor, diaper creams, cortisone, neosporin, coconut oil, breast milk applied topically…) but finally after things only sort of working and then not, this week I decided it was time to take him to the doctor.  Because of everything I went through with Will, I knew what the story would be.  It turns out baby G has bad eczema, a bacterial skin infection (on his face, behind his ear and in his belly button), a yeast infection in his neck folds and in his diaper area…BOO.  And all of this may or may not be linked to food and/or environmental allergies.  Chances are, this little guy will be like his big brother and have lots of both.

As soon as I found out I was pregnant last year I considered this and remembered all I went through with Will and felt strong in my heart that we will handle whatever comes our way.  I still feel that way, but it stinks.  I am nursing Gus and am not going to stop as it is hands down the best nutrition for him and nursing is going so well, but this means I have to track what I’m eating and try to determine what may be causing these outbreaks and upsets.  Once he starts to eat foods (in about 2 months) we’ll have to watch carefully and be prepared for reactions.  It is tough stuff, but I always tell myself it could be worse.  And my husband and I are a good team and we will make it work.  Just like we did and do for Mr. Will.  But it makes me sad to see my baby suffer and I wish I could just make it go away.

So for now, I’m tracking my foods and seeing how he responds to what is and isn’t in my diet.  My hope is that this detective work will give us some possible answers and will help us determine when we should (or what we shouldn’t) introduce into his diet when he begins eating solids.  At least this time around I know what I’m dealing with – the road ahead will have allergies and asthma most likely.

I need to remember to believe in myself as his mother.  When I look into those sweet eyes, I know he believes in me and he trusts me so completely.  I will do whatever it takes.

3 thoughts on “whatever it takes

  1. So beautiful! Happy 4 months Jessica! And you do need to always believe in yourself as a mother. You're wonderful. And good for you for sticking with it and being willing to do whatever it takes so your sweet boy won't suffer. So hard to see our kids hurting…no matter what it is. Hope you figure things out. Such a sweet picture!! xo

  2. Ugh! I've BTDT! At one point I was eating only 5 foods as we tried to figure out what was causing Shoo to break out in hives from my breastmilk. We were lucky when both seemed to outgrow their allergies, but now we've come full circle with Jones showing up with a new peanut allergy.

    Hope you can figure it out quickly!
    Shoot me an email at mom2shoo at gmail.com and we can figure it out.

  3. He is adorable! So sorry you are dealing with this and I hope you are able to figure some things out soon! You are an amazing mom– hang in there!

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